Noah (2014) – Antic Greenpeace Activist or First Religious Terrorist ?

I’ve just watched this monument of glorious “WTF?”

I was expecting nothing out of it, this is so far way from my usual interests and liking. Let alone Religion… And all the mess and buzz around that movie, didn’t reach me at all.

I won’t paraphrase the plot as anyone knows it, or at least anyone who had the brain parasited by the that thing called “religion”. Just take the traditional Noah fairy tale and add some kind of Stone giants, gold magic beans, some kind of mystical animals and obviously the archetype of the bad bad bad human who thinks that everything it’s his propriety (that’s why Naoh’s fighting for if you didn’t understand..)

So, I watched it like a docile sheep and I laughed… few times. Some scenes and dialogues are amusing : “Are we man?” screams a man to other men standing in the rain, “because if you’re a man you can kill ” wispering to Noah’s son, and so on…Add to that the half-biblical speeches of Noah about the destiny, faith, “the creator” and how hard it is form him (and it must be).

The question of the film could be, I guess, is Human kind worth saving? You end up watching Noah trying to find an answer, that it is revealed to him only at the end, before comiting someting horrible. On this aspect I must admit that it was interesting and well played by Crowes although quite subtle. It might be the only thing worth mentioning actually. Before that, he preaches and moans between  canibalism and Stone Transformers.

Let’s be clear and be calmed down, there’s nothing religious in this movie as far as I’m concerned. The Naoh story is just a skeleton to build a rather dull and expected structure for Russell Crowe to moan an preach. Imagine “the bible meets Star Wars” or something like this.

There are so ridicule things though.That you could forget if the movie wasn’t what it is. Noah helped by his giant friends build the ark bigger than the White House in few years (he didn’t age at all, just shaved his head),Ok…. The always fashionable son with perfect hair and beard (you’re talking about a period where soap wasn’t dreamed of, right ?)Ok…I could just say that I wake up everyday with Robert Smith hairstyle, in the 21st century. Although you can see some dreadlocks in Emma Watson’s hair. What the familly eat on that boat while those several weeks or Noah goes beyond human anatomy ? They’re details, yes, but It shows you where was my interest during the movie I guess.

On the plus side, the movie is quite entertaining, I haven’t got bored and watched it until the end. In this regard, good job, for a movie which costed so much, is a success. It’s really well built that’s for sure and makes you, almost, forget the all terrible topic.

Remains a question that popped in my mind, Is Noah the first mad religious extermist terrorist and first genocide of Human kind or the first Greenpeace extremist activist ?

In either way, he greatly succeeded in what any dalek dreams of !



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